Canasta

If you have ever heard of this you may be thinking, ah yes, canasta- sort of like rummy, i play it with my grandmother every time she comes to visit; which is what this unpopular game most popularily refers to.

However, another possibly unreliable source (my wise and knowledgable yoga teacher) has another idea:

It involves a deck of cards reading very deep and undefinable emotions (i.e. i am divine peace)
This card is then set aside and a brief description is read followed my silent meditation and attempts to find this so called "divine peace" or whathaveyou. Very spirtual. OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMM.

Cereal Addict

Yes, I know, these two words are already in existence but it is together that they hold the most power. You may already be a cereal addict or maybe that time has not yet come for you however it is inevitable-You will become a cereal addict. I guarantee you, this time as a cereal addict will be the most wonderful, fibre filled period in your life.

I say that we start a club! Yes, that sounds great (or should i say Grrrrrrrrrrrreat!), lets all go celebrate with a nice bowl of cereal.

3 signs that you may be a cereal addict
1. You are eating cereal right now
2. You know all of the slogans of the major brands of cereal (example: Fruit Loops-Follow Your Nose!)
3. You consider cereal to be an appropriate meal at all times of the day, not just breakfast

Hey guys! Feel free to post some of your fav cereal recipes in the comments page. I myself am partial to the Brown sugar mini-wheates mixed with bananas (cut into slices and then in half)starting out with 2% milk and then adding 1% milk as you go on, try it, it's good.

Bloozmers

Bloozmers are people who judge you by the pitch of your sneeze, assuming the lowest intelligence rating of Total Ditz is signified by the highest pitch.

Blogged

Remember that time when you had one too many of Nana's cookies? Being blogged is that feeling of absolute fullness but not to the extent that you feel sick to your stomach. It is likely that all you feel like doing/ are able to do is lay/sit allowing the food to digest because too much movement may cause an unpleasant scene(to say the least).

Breakfast Wig

Wigs are of the highest in fashion these days. Most common is the classic Breakfast Wig that is worn early morning to disguise that shameful bed head. Occasionally one will commit a most embarrassing social blunder and be caught in a breakfast wig during the brunch hour. If every one did it, it wouldn’t be so bad. It might even be like one of those laid back Tostitos commercials but with breakfast wigs instead of a broken elevator (”Hey guys, LET’S GET NAKED!” ) but generally you should avoid this senario at all costs.

Shown here is the Quaker Oats man, notorious for wearing his breakfast wig to every social gathering, which he is allowed to do because he is a rich eccentric, and not a crazy old man.

SusanneRocks Ltd.

Admiroscourge

Admiroscourge is what you feel when something continues to not work over and over again. You get this hot rage feeling in your stomach that grows and grows as you fix something and have it break again until you get an uncontrollable urge to toss your freaking discman out the window!!!!! You restrain your self but the urge only grows stronger! You’re seeing red! The room is spinning!! DESTROY!!! DESTROY!!
GEEAAAARRRRRAAGGGHH!!!! It could go either way from here. You may take a few deep breaths, put down the knife and do some yoga OR you could take that freaking CD player and SMASH THE LIVING HELL OUT OF IT!!!
YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!

Nail-Jam

Not quite the same as toe jam as this jam is found under your finger nails. Some people never attempt to get it out which I think is brutally necessary for both cleanliness AND vanity sake.

Amberclause

An amberclause (not to be confused with a nexoclause): Let's remember back to grade 6 - a state of innocence, confusion and first loves. Remembering that one boy in particular, Johnny, now pimply and udderly uncool, was the desire of every girl in his class AND he knew it too. Every girl dying to be his one-and-only would need to take particular steps of percaution, all striving to be queen of cool. However, a true queen of cool doesnt waste her time with "striving" and simply would unspeakably be THE queen of cool. nonetheless, all or most females would be queen of cool imitators trying to show ultimate maturosity. I bet you're wondering where the hell an amberclause comes in, right? well, as none of the girls will actually become queen of cool, they will have their downfalls: The most common one being clumbsiness. While trying to impress Johnny, a common example of an amberclause would be that unladylike slow motion ankle roll from the ladylike platform shoes. Now, you may be thinking Golden opportunity - boy helps girl up - love at first sight, right? BUT no: A queen of cool imitator is incapable of doing this gracefully, perhaps getting an uncool scab or worse, exposing her flowery and -GOD FORBID- torn underpants to Johnny thus classifiable an amberclause- horribly embarrassing. An amberclause is also commonly used in romantic comedies world wide.
For Example: Clumbsy girl is madly in love with Perfect Guy who will only ever notice her during an episode of an amberclause. Don't worry though! - Clumbsy girl always lives happily ever after with perfect guy in the end.

Note: In order to be an amberclause, the incident must occur at a crucial moment of necessary maturosity in front of "won't settle for less" Johnny.